Farkle! I Scare and Intimidate People!

So Friday night, chillin at home. Got 'the Book' on my screen. Playin me some Farkle. Might I just say that it is quite exhilarating throwing dice and trying to rack up points against a random live player that I have never and will never meet in my life. Heck, it's the closest thing to gambling. Good thing it's not for real money. But, it sure is teaching me solid lessons.

First and foremost rule of the key to success is of course, you DON'T gamble. I have it set so that each day, I don't gamble anything, but instead invest in what I already have. I keep a strict rule of not going under a certain amount of chips. Every day, I establish that amount by taking my total number of chips and rounding to the nearest ten-thousand. (Ex, today I had 151,050 chips. So therefore I would not do anything that would make me go under 150,000) So therefore, my goal of the day would be to play as much as I can to reach 160,000 by the end of the day without going under. (And try to get a little extra) So then the next day, if I wake up with 161,000, my new limit would be 160,000 and I would just keep going. Solid system.

ANYWAYS, I'm sure you would have cared less to know all that information and probably want to know what this blog post is about, hopefully not thinking that it is about some silly Facebook game. It's actually about how God has used this game to do some good.

For the past couple of weeks, this other girl and I have tried to beat each other and try to get more chips than the other. I've been keeping up with my solid system, and she's been trying to catch up. We chatted tonight just talking to each other about our games and how she was determined to catch up and I was not going to let her and all this and that. When all of a sudden, she came to the realization that we have never actually talked outside of the small chats we've recently had on 'da book' about this game. And I asked her why and boy was the response shocking.

After she said that we usually don't talk, we kinda paused for a moment and wondered why. She flat out told me:

"anyway you scare me kinda that's why we dont talk i guess

and no offense you seem really stuck up

and like you wouldn't want to bother talking to someone like me"

I was shocked! What!? I scared her? I was stuck up?

Okay, false statement. I wasn't shocked. This would not have been the first time I had heard this. And so I wanted to dig deeper and let her get it all out. She did. And so then I apologized. And as we kept talking she realized that there really was more to me than meets the eye. As she stated, she didn't think that I bothered to talk to "someone like her." I asked her who "someone like her" was... She said, different, an outcast, isn't completely a Christian, all fun but and barely serious... Different.

"i just think that everyone at church thinks they are better than me and that im dirt compared to them so i dont believe anything anyone says there"

I told her she was wrong. She didn't like being judged by "people at church" because of who she was and that is what sometimes keeps h

er from going. Up until tonight she had labeled me as "the leader of those people" (her exact words). I think I nearly died laughing. Once again I apologized and I explained to her that of all those people, I would be the last one to judge anyone for any reason. I told her that I have see firsthand how kids have been turned away from the church simply because they did not find the welcoming environment they thought they could be at. I explained to her how personally frustrated I feel about that and how I am one to stand against that type of behavior.

One time, my friend and I sincerely and seriously went up to her and told her that she looked beautiful that day. No it was not a joke. It was truth. She's one of those that many would call "different" because of how she dresses. But when one Sunday she does something different with her make up and puts on a dress, my friend and I were blown away! So we felt the need to tell her that she was a beautiful girl. She didn't forget it and brought it back up tonight and asked if it was a joke because she sure thought it was. FARKLE, I mean FAIL. It was not. I clarified it with her. She didn't know what to do.

She kept labeling herself as one who is an outcast and is different from "all those people" at church. I simply told her, I am not like "all those people." Prior to this conversation she asked me about my relationship with the girl I am in one with and she accepted it and was cool with it. And with the music and the magic and the relationship I have and my own view of people, she finally understood that I was different, kind of like her but in different ways. And with that, it made her feel a bit better.

Since this was not the first I that someone was "scared" or "intimidated" of me, I finally started to realize why I am the way I am. At church or wherever else, I might be the dude who likes to make his presence known whenever he enters a room (I guess to put it one way) and to make people feel uncomfortable. I view that as my way of loving people. Sure it might scare them or whatever. But God would not have made me this way if it wasn't for a purpose. And He would not have opened up the opportunities that I have had to connect with people like the girl I talked to tonight. The one who feels they are the outcast because they are "different." I believe that God made me different in my own special ways so that He could use me to express His Love to others like with the girl I talked to tonight. And when I say "different," I mean DIFFERENT," but unique and special! (Did I miss any similar words?)

Tonight, I gained a new friend because God was able to open up the opportunity for me to reach out to one whom He loves and wanted me to make sure that they were not left out. Sure she may say that she's not "completely a Christian." Maybe that's why I've been put into her life. To show her the way. Whatever God wants to use me for, I'm down.

She considers one of the elderly ladies from the church as one of her only real friends. This is because they spend a lot of time together and the lady is the one who takes her to church. She feels bad because she thinks she is using the lady to get rides because she doesn't have a license. I promised her that in January, I would pick her up, we would go over to the lady's house and do housework all day and hang out with her.

She's down. I'm excited.